|
Post by Miss Hannah Harper on Nov 19, 2007 15:09:48 GMT -5
Hey, it's me, the Sexiest Woman in all of Wrestling Hannah Harper as FTW RAMPAGE Presents its first Thanksgiving Special this Thursday Night from the Oracle Arena in Oakland, California.The Rematch from last Saturday will also be an NEW Universal Championship Qualifying Match, as Eddie G. takes on Ethan Everhart with Ian Mason (Everhart's Manager) as Guest Referee. I hope Eddie gets deported back to Mexico where he belongs. HA! Another NEW Universal Championship Qualifier. Iron Man Jimmy Ice takes on an unknown opponent who very well might know where GM Beverly Hyatt is. I hope Iron Man trips on the Entrance Ramp on his way out and falls flat on his face. HA! Ben Zenith will defend his NBA World Championship against Big Time Bobby Money and Bobby's partner Mark Mayhem will be Guest Enforcer while Selena is our Guest Time Keeper. Oh yes, there will also be NO Disqualifications. I hope Ben gets arrested for steroid abuse! HA! And finally, Mr. Natural will defend his FTW World Title against Super Girl Missy Monroe. No one may interfere on Missy's behalf in this match or not only will Missy lose the match, she will also lose her precious NBA Women's Title. Meggan Monroe will be the Guest Ring Announcer to introduce Missy. Poor Missy, She SUCKS!HA!!!! PLUS: The Debut of Kenua, Craig LoveCraft & Much More! Don't miss FTW Rampage LIVE on The FX Channel.Post Promos.
|
|
|
Post by Mr. Natural on Nov 19, 2007 21:36:17 GMT -5
**The scene opens with Gwen Diamond standing in the middle of the ring with the microphone in her hand, wearing next to nothing, in her silver laced lingerie-like mini-dress and diamond studded neclace.**
Gwen: Hey, you dumb pricks!!! Get your STUPID MOTHERF**KING ASSES UP!!! And help me welcome the best thing going today, the one true MESSIAH OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING!!! He is the FTW World Heavyweight Champion!!! That's right, it's the ONE AND ONLY, MR. NATURAL!!!
**The boos rain down on the arena, as the lights dim and the strobe lights flash on and off in the arena. The fans begin to throw debris into the ring area. Internationally Known by Supernatural nearly drowns out the boos as it plays loudly in the arena. Natural is seen in a silhouette behind a white screen. The FTW Dancers are dancing on the sides of the ring and on cue they point towards Natural as the screen goes up. Mr. Natural walks down the entrance ramp alongside his pet white lion named "Death", who roars at the crowd. He is dressed in his usual wrestling attire. His trademark t-shirt says "Missy can suck my bone this Thanksgiving". He hands the lion to a trainer and enters the ring. Announcers Al Albert & Mr. Entertainment Seth Jordan are at ring side.**
Al: Here we go again.
Seth: Yesss!
Al: Hey, that's my line!
**Gwen hands him the mic, as he slaps her in the ass. She smiles as she leaves the ring. Natural climbs up the second rope and addresses the crowd.**
Natural: SHUT THE F**K UP!!!!!!!!! NOWWWW!!!!!!!
**The Crowd is filled anger as they continue to boo and curse at Mr. Natural.**
Natural: At the next FTW Rampage I am going to TITTY F**K A SLUT BY THE NAME OF MISSY MONROE!!!! That STUPID SLUT WILL ENJOY MY BIG FAT DICK!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
Seth: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!!!!
Al: That disgusting bastard!
Natural: I want Missy to take a LONG HARD ASS LOOK AT THE HUGE BULGE I HAVE IN MY TIGHTS!!!! AARRGGHH DAMN IT ALL!!!! Missy I want you to see how this match is going to go!!! SOMEBODY RING THE F**KIN BELL NOW!!!!!!!!!!
**The bell rings as Natural grabs Gwen by the neck and tongues the living daylights out of her and pushes her to the ground. Gwen simply smiles and laughs. Natural sits on her face and throws a fart as the referee makes the pin, 1...2...3!!!! Natural stands up and Gwen gets up with a huge smile on her face.**
Seth: HAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!! I LOVE THIS GUY!!!!
Al: Excuse you!?!
Natural: Missy you BITCH! I AM GOING TO RAPE YOU IN THIS RING AND NO ONE, NOT EVEN JIMMY CAN SAVE YOU!!! AND WHEN I'M DONE WITH YOU, I AM GOING TO RAPE YOUR SISTER AND F**K HER DOGGYSTYLE!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!! DOGGYSTYLE BABBBYYYY!!!!! WHY?!?! BECAUSE OF THE BITCH SHE IS!!! And There isn't a damn thing YOU, BEN, JIMMY, THE FBI, THE CIA, THE NSA, NASA, CONGRESS, KING KONG, GODZILLA, AL ALBERT THAT SILLY F**K, OR AAAANNYYYOOONNNEEEE CAN DO ABOUT IT!!!
Al: Natural....has....gone....PSYCHO!!!!
**Natural spots a young lady in the front with a sign that reads "MY NAME IS MISSY!" Natural quickly runs to the outside, rips her sign out of her hand, pulls her over the barricade by the hair and throws her in the ring. The young girl begs off crying. The crowd is extremely upset and begin to throw objects towards Mr. Natural.**
Natural: HOW F**KING CUTE!!! Well, check it out Monkey breaths, HER F**KING NAME IS MISSY!!!! WELL WHOOP-DE-F**KIN-DOO!!!!!!!!! REF, YOU DICK!!! RING THE BELL!!!
**The bell rings as Natural smushes the young ladies face to the mat with so much force that she begins to bleed from nose and the referee counts 1,2,3!!!**
Seth: OH SHIT!!!!! NATURAL IS ON A ROLL!!!!!!!!!! Damn son, she's bleeding too! HAHAHA!!! This shit is hilarious!!!
Al: I hate you.
**Suddenly a young lady that looks like Missy runs down the ramp and into the ring.**
Al: WAIT!!! IT'S MISSY!!!! COME ON MISSY!!! KICK HIS ASSSS!!!
Seth: HAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!! That's not Missy you blind f**k.
Al: What? Damn! It's someone that really looks like Missy!
Natural: YOU WANT ME BITCH!!!??!! COME AND GET ME!!!!
**Natural once again calls for the bell**
Al: This is just wrong!
**Natural slaps the fake Missy in the face, then kicks her in the gut and hits her with the Force of Nature**
Seth: DAMN I LOVE THAT MOVE!!!
**Natural pins fake Missy by sticking his crotch in her face.**
1...
2...
3!!!
Al: THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!!!
Seth: NO, THIS SHIT IS FUNNY. HAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!
Gwen: HERE IS YOUR WINNER AND STILL THE MOTHERF**KING FTW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...MR. NATURAALLL!!!!!
**Mr. Natural grabs Gwen and begins to tongue her. He grabs the mic and pushes her aside. The crowd boos as Mr. Natural laughs aloud. The scene fades out to black.**
|
|
|
Post by Super Girl on Nov 19, 2007 22:37:18 GMT -5
*This is taken from the pages of Missy's Blog* Gosh, have you bumped into a co-worker that you really didn't want to bump into? Yeah, there are some like Ben, Eddie, Sean and others that me and Jimmy have bump into, and they're great. But then, there are others like Bobby, Mark, Hannah, and especially this one guy that seems to pop up when you least expect him to. Well, let me take you back a few days ago. *We see Jimmy and Missy inside Bob's Supermarket. They are dressed casually and are at the fruit section. Missy is holding a pear and Jimmy is holding a cantaloupe* Jimmy: This looks good. Missy: Lolz! Jimmy: Huh, Lolz? I thought you just said that when you were online. *Suddenly we see who appears to be Mr. Natural who is in a wheelchair as he spots Jimmy and Missy from afar and begins to stare at them. He is with his kids.* Missy:*whispering to Jimmy* Oh shit, don't look now Jimmy.... *Jimmy goes to look, but Missy quickly stops him* Missy: *Speaking through her teeth* No. It's that weirdo, Mr. Natural. Let's just ignore his sorry ass. Jimmy: *Also speaking through his teeth* Why is he in a wheelchair? And why is he wearing that neck brace? Missy: Oh you didn't know? He's falsely claiming disability checks from the United States Government. Do you want to know what the funny part is? Jimmy: *Whispering* What? Missy: *Whispering* He's a real mental cripple. *Jimmy laughs out loud and Missy quickly covers his mouth* Jimmy: C'mon babe, you don't have to hide from his tourettes havin ass. You can take him. Missy: I know babe, but he just loves making a scene all the time and besides that, I just feel sorry for him that he's just such a loser. But no worries hon, I'm going to kick his tourettes havin ass this Thursday at the FTW Rampage show. Now let's just get our Turkey and go. Jimmy: Okay honey buns. Missy: Thank you cutie pie. Jimmy: Your welcome sugar dumpling. Missy: Anytime, hot cakes. Jimmy: Um...let's just go before we make a scene. *Natural begins to call out to them as they leave the area. Missy tosses a bag of marshmallows and hits him in the face.* Natural: HEY, WHERE ARE YOU GOING? DON'T HAVE A DICK!!! *Scene fades out as Jimmy throws a box of Lucky Charms at Mr. Natural* Now, if you think that's all that happened, well your wrong. Afterwards, Jimmy and I decided to secretly tape Mr. Natural at the Supermarket. We decided to publish it online. Now we must warn you, this is funny shit, so please don't drink while watching this or you will spit up your drink. NATURAL AT THE SUPERMARKET
See Ya next time at Missy's Blog! Lolz.
|
|
|
Post by Jimmy Ice on Nov 19, 2007 23:31:27 GMT -5
lmao!!!!! Its the return of the Tourettes Kid! Awesome work Miss!
|
|
|
Post by Mr. Natural on Nov 20, 2007 0:57:21 GMT -5
Hey, I remember this. I hate you. Lmao, but I still hate you
|
|
|
Post by Mr. Natural on Nov 20, 2007 1:12:58 GMT -5
**Mr. Natural is seen outside of Missy's home. He is dressed in camaflouge along with an FTW Camera crew. Missy is seen inside the kitchen trying to prepare a huge turkey while Jimmy is outside watering the lawn.** Natural: Hey G'DAY MOTHERF**KERS!!! We are outside the UGLY ASS HOME OF JIMMY AND MISSY!!! She wanted to spy on me that KINKY ASS STALKING ASS BITCH ASS BITCH!!!!!Well, I'm here to video tape her as she does her thanksgiving day dinner. **Natural peeks inside with the camera and begins to laugh.** Natural: HARHARHARHARHAR!!!!!!!!!! **Natural punches out the camera guy and takes the video camera in his hands.** Natural: You think MY SHIT WAS FUNNY!!! ?!!!! **Yells in the sound guy's ears** Natural: I said.... YOU THOUGHT MY F**KING SHIT WAS FUNNY!!!!! ??!!!!! Well, I want you to take a look at this SHIT! Missy thinks that she's going to be able to wrestle against ME, when she can't even wrestle a F**KING TURKEY!!!!! ??!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!!!!! **Natural begins to record as we hear a thud in the backyard.** Natural: Want to see what I recorded??? CHECK OUT YOUTUBE BITCHESSSS!!!!!!!! Missy vs. A Turkey www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZmHD0oD75M
|
|
|
Post by Ethan Everhart on Nov 20, 2007 2:47:24 GMT -5
LMAO! Natural, that was the funniest thing I ever saw. I think the Turkey won that match lol! and Missy that was hilarious too. You guys are killing me! I haven't laughed so hard in a long time.
|
|
|
Post by Ethan Everhart on Nov 20, 2007 3:21:13 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]Everhart is seen backstage in Beverly Hyatt's office with Ian Mason, his Manager. They are both dressed in black suits and are wearing black shades. Ethan has a rose in his hand.[/glow]
Ethan: Eddie, you might want to look for Miss Hyatt, but it's obvious that Beverly is no longer with us. Let's be honest with ourselves shall we? She has magically disappeared off the face of the Earth. And I know a little bit about magic Eddie. Miss Hyatt had a pretty face and some perky breasts, but that's all she had going for her. Now she's just a memory. Jimmy wants to try and find her as well, but he's wasting his damn time. So I'm here , not to pay my last respects, because she seriously never earned my respect. She had her little favorites like Missy, Ben and yourself Eddie. So no, she will not be missed and I for one am glad that she's gone. That lady was nothing special to begin with. But enough about the past and enough about a storyline that has to deal with an incompetent boss. I hope they find her dead raped body in the woods somewhere.
[glow=red,2,300]Ethan throws down the rose and steps on it. He then spits on Beverly Hyatts desk as Ian looks on in laughter. Ethan removes his shades and looks directly at the camera.[/glow]
Ethan: Now Eddie G., In our first encounter, well let's face it, you were fortunate to get the upset. But I got news for you, you Carlos Mencia wanna be, it won't happen again junior. You can absolutely sure that it won't EVER happen again. Our match certainly caught the eyes of the FTW Bookers to such a point that they wanted to see this match again and have one of us qualify for the NEW Universal Championship. I will get past you and move on to beat anyone else that gets in my way.
[glow=red,2,300]Ethan snaps his finger and suddenly Beverly's desk is on fire. He magically makes a photo of Eddie G. appear in his hand[/glow]
Ethan: Face it, Beverly is gone Eddie. And soon you will be just a memory like her. You see Eddie, in the case between me and you, this won't be a mystery that Iron Man Sherlock Holmes won't be able to solve. I will be the one to make you magically disappear from the face of wrestling. So since you like fire so much Eddie, this is for you! Ashes to ashes, dust to dust!
[glow=red,2,300]Ethan Everhart tosses the photo of Eddie G. into the flames. Ian is laughing as The Oracle Ethan Everhart has a stoic look upon his face. Ethan and Ian walk out of the room and the flames slowly die down as the scene slowly fades out. [/glow]
|
|
|
Post by Eddie G. on Nov 20, 2007 5:34:38 GMT -5
I was so busy writing the NBA Zombies that I got too tired to post a promo. Even though it won't make a difference esse. I will still beat Ethan's magic act.
|
|
|
Post by Eddie G. on Nov 20, 2007 5:36:20 GMT -5
Oooooh, Natural and Missy are in Video wars!lmbo
|
|
Big Time
Junior Status
I Get Money, Money I GOT!
Posts: 88
|
Post by Big Time on Nov 20, 2007 17:19:46 GMT -5
Bobby Money is at ringside during an FTW Event. He joins his old colleague and announce partner Al Albert at ringside while two local indy wrestlers are in the ring. Money has the NBA Tag Title perched upon his shoulder and is wearing an off beige Armani spring suit.
Al: Bobby, what brings you back here to the announce booth after all this time?
Bobby: Well, let's face it Al, ever since I've gone on to bigger and better things, you've been lost without me. So, I decided that for one night I would give you the feeling of nostalgia and show the people out there how it's done. However, I'm not here to talk about these two asswipes in the ring. I'm here to talk about my match, MY Championship match, against that loser Ben Zenith!
Al: No problem Bobby. In fact I know that you've been looking forward to this match for a while now.
Bobby: That's an understatement Al. It's no big secret that Ben has been avoiding me like the plague for a long time. He knows that he is no real champion. No real champion ducks an opponent the way he has for so long. You see, in our last match together, I was the one who challenged him and that poor man's Dwayne Johnson, Jimmy Ice! Zenith doesn't have it in him to admit that his time is up and that someone alot better, alot stronger, and a hell of alot better looking than him, has come along to claim the crown here in the NBA. Now I don't care if it's in an FTW ring, an NEW ring, and ECWF ring or a TNA ring, I'm going to show the world why Bobby Money is Big Time! But just so you know Al, this match had to be set up by Hannah Harper! This isn't Ben's doing, nor is it that wench's Bev Hyatt's doing, because we all know how Ben used to kiss that ass, This was forced on him because he was too much of a damn coward to put up the title against me!
Al: Amazing! Tell me Bobby, how do you think you will fair against the champion this Thanksgiving?
Bobby: I should slap you right there for asking such a stupid question! Let me show you what I would do.
Bobby places his jacket and his belt on the announcer's desk. He rolls up his sleeves and jumps inside the ring. He takes both men out with a Big Time Clothesline and begins to stomp away at them both. He climbs the ropes and hits them both with a Money Shot. He covers both men and tells the referee to make the count. The ref counts to three and lifts up his hands as the crowd boos him.
Al: Well there you have it folks, Bobby Money may very well be your NEXT NBA World Heavyweight Champion! Wow!
The scene fades out with Bobby Money taunting the crowd.
|
|
|
Post by Super Girl on Nov 20, 2007 21:31:27 GMT -5
lolz that was hilarious Natural, but now it's my turn. Bwahahahahaha
|
|
|
Post by Ben Zenith on Nov 23, 2007 3:16:06 GMT -5
The show should be posted soon guys.
|
|
|
Post by Ben Zenith on Nov 23, 2007 3:16:25 GMT -5
sorry for the delay.
|
|
|
Post by Ben Zenith on Nov 23, 2007 4:02:00 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300]Ben Zenith is seen backstage listening to Bobby Money's last promo. He is with Meggan by his side, as she also prepares for the event. The NBA Camera Crew closes in on them as they seem to be whispering to one another. The crowd pops as they see the NBA Champion.[/glow]
Ben Zenith: Well, it's no surprise to see you here. I've been preparing for tonight in more ways than one, and that's why I haven't been able to respond to Bobby's recent rants. (Imitates Bobby) blah, blah, blah, it's all about me, MY match, MY championship match! (Stops imitating Bobby) I got news for you Big Mouth Bobby Loser, this isn't about YOU! It's about the richest prize in our sport today! It's about prestige! It's about honor! It's ABOUT the NBA World Heavyweight Title! So get over yourself Bobby, and listen up REAL close. If you think that this is going to be a walk in the park, then you are sadly mistaken rich boy. Bobby, you're one half of the NBA Tag Team Champions, and though it's great to aspire to MORE, you're going to find that it's a lot MORE than your sorry ass bargained for. You talk about Earning a title and paying your dues, but son, you LOST the last match you were in, and it was a Tag match, and you're one half of the NBA Tag Team Champions! So tell me, how are you earning a title shot again? Just be careful what you wish for Money, because after tonight, I just might send your ass back broke, and not in the way that you and Mark like to break backs. Oh, I remember that show you two were in, "Queer eye for the straight guy." Yeah, I know how you like to do it "Big Time" with your buddy Mark.
[glow=red,2,300]The crowd laughs as Ben pauses to hear the cheers of the crowd. Meggan looks on in approval.[/glow]
Ben: How can I put it, so that even your little mind can understand? Hmmm, not that I think of it, I can't! Not because I don't KNOW how, it's just that no matter how I put it, you just won't get it. As hard as you try, and as loud as you speak, YOU will NEVER be in my league. You claim that this was forced on me because I was a damn coward to fight you? (Laughs) I know you really want to believe that, but even you know that's a load of bull! Bobby, with each word you speak I realize one thing, that not Al, But YOU should be the one getting slapped for your silly kindergarten level promos. Bobby, you know DAMN well that I'm not some two bit local indy wrestler that you are going to walk through. Do you actually think that anyone was impressed with you beating up on two no-names, especially after they were tired from having their own match? Silly Bobby, when will you ever learn that Tricks are for kids! Man up Bobby, and stop putting words in Al Albert's mouth. He personally told me the other day that you should have stayed doing color commentary, or managing other losers, because the ONLY reason you became a Tag Champ was because of your partner. Listen, don't make this any harder on yourself than it has to be. The more you talk, the more you show the world why you are not a World champion.
[glow=red,2,300]Meggan whispers something in Ben's ears and he nods his head in agreement.[/glow]
Ben: Right. We have to leave now Bobby, but rest assured, I do my best TALKING in the ring. So shut up, man up, and bring it Big Bitch!
[glow=red,2,300]The crowd cheers loudly as Ben and Meggan smile at the camera. The scene fades as Ben and Meggan walk away.[/glow]
|
|